Fantasy Football

WEEK 5
Al finally won a game and Hawbaker suffered its first loss to highlight this week. Buck Nekkid has yet to win, but they are still in the hunt at this early stage of the season, which has 13 regular season games.

The top scores:

166.0 Rodgers Hawbaker
148.3 Brady Wahoos
142.4 Newton Al
138.2 Brees Stalkers
127.4 Stafford Hawbaker

116.3 Manning Dirt
113.2 Vick Jordan
105.9 Welker Johnson
104.5 Fitzpatrick Stalkers
102.1 Hasselback Buck

101.2 F Jackson Al
99.4 Schaub Ben
99.1 C Johnson Wahoos
97.3 McCoy Johnson
90.7 Peterson Wahoos

WEEK 2
After 2 games, there are only 2 teams who are undefeated and 2 teams who have yet to win. As any experienced fantasy owner knows, things can change dramatically.

At this early stage though, the Chesterfield Wahoos are crushing the opposition with big numbers, averaging over 130 points per game, led by studs T Brady, A Peterson, and Megatron C Johnson.

Wahoo owner, Todd Reynolds, who made his billions on the recent Obamacare mandates, is happy to be part of the league. "Owning a football team has been a dream of mine since I moved to Virginia during the late 80s," noted Reynolds this week to the Richmond Dispatch. "Being so close to DC and meeting so many Foreskin fans, and me being a Bills fan, I wanted to create a team that would dominate on a big level. I hope to pick up more Bills players down the road."

The surprising Hawbaker squad is also 2-0, led by A Rodgers, the Jets, and a bunch of consistent players. Owner Big Jim Hawbaker is happy with the team, who is averaging over 105 points per game. "I really have no control over my players or how the other teams play", stated Big Jim. "It's 90% luck."

Al Whitcher's team is 0-2, but with R Rice and F Jackson kicking butt, he is thinking of starting 2nd stringer C Newton, who is averaging 31 points.

Other big players after 2 weeks are Johnson's McCoy (24 points), Stalkers' Brees (32), Ben's Austin (23), Dirt's Rivers (22), Jordan's Vick (22), and Buck's Forte (19). Interestingly, the Bills have yet to start K Britt (22), Hawbaker has benched Stafford (31), and the Stalkers wonder what to do with the great bench play of Fitzsimmons (30).

Stalkers owner Dan Sherwin of Florida, who made his billions on the illegal betting industry, has the best QB combo in the league, but is still 1-1, like most of the league.

Week 3 should lead to some shake-ups in the standings, as many players are injured, questionable, or lost for the season. A lot of activity is taking place in the add/drop market.

WEEK 1
There were some big surprises to start the fantasy season, startting with Stevie's Big Johnson starters who accumulated 121 points (including 108.6 for the reserves).

The Chestefield Wahoos also won big, aided by Brady's 43 points.

Jordan's Team went over 100 points thanks to the Baltimore D/ST and kicker Ackers.

Hawbaker squeaked out a win over Al's Team by the last game heroics of Janikowski's leg.

Shapiro's Stalkers had QBs Brees and Fitzpatrick total up 67.7 points, but the starters lost to the Dirt Dwellers whose Chicago D/ST had top marks.

Starters + Reserves = Total:

Johnson     121 + 108.6 = 229.6
Dirt            98.8 + 89.9 = 188.7
Al              93.8 + 90.0 = 183.8
Hawbaker   102.7 + 80.8 = 183.5
Wahoos    105.4 + 67.6 = 173.0

Jordan       101.2 + 57.5 = 158.7
Stalkers      90.1 + 58.1 = 148.2
Buck          63.5 + 63.0 = 126.5
Ben            76.9 + 49.1 = 126.0
Bills           49.2 + 76.5 = 125.7

PRE-SEASON
The 1st annual Portville Fantasy Football league has begun, and the draft is complete. The 10-team league held it's auto draft on September 8, 2011, and several owners are pleased with the results.

Using 2010 point totals, and averaging the number of points per player taken, here are the initial draft results:

Ben Reynolds 170.29
Skip Giberson 170.15
Wayne Sales   160.58
Brad Snyder     147.01
Todd Reynolds 144.37

Daniel Sherwin     137.73
Jimmy Reynolds 135.63
Al Whitcher        130.19
Jordan Reynolds 122.37
Adam Wysocki    121.23

Because Fantasy Football is 90% luck, 5% skill, and 5% dedication, everyone and anyone is in the hunt.

We'll see if these numbers match up to the season results.

It should be fun.